In a patriarchal society dominated by superficial beauty and sex, the feminine form has always been the canvas upon which men painted their whimsical desires. Thin, thick, big breasts, small breasts, slim ankles and wide hips, whatever is fodder for male wet dreams, becomes the standard for female beauty. Then the dream changes, and many women are left scrambling to change themselves to stay “in style.”
This has never been more apparent than now, “The Age of The Fat Ass.”
Sure, a curvaceous figure has been “in” since the Rubenesque period, but now it has become dangerous. Take a look at the story of Apryl Brown, which is but one example of the devastation caused by a disturbing trend. Jones was forced to get both her arms and legs amputated because of butt injections she received at a “pumping party.” Placing the blame on insecurity about her figure, she became a motivational speaker to inspire women to encourage one another:
“We don’t validate each other,” she says. “We really don’t know how our friends feel about us, unless we have very expressive friends.”
But we know how men feel about us. We know to many of them, we are nothing but sex objects and many women mis-identify that objectification as empowerment, particularly in the context of Hip-Hop. In an astonishingly sexist article, Vibe.com decided to examine the evolution of ass in Hip-Hop. Yes, booty has, and continues to be an integral part of the culture, but this was no scholarly dissertation or respectful appreciation of the female backside.
From Nicki Minaj and Beyoncé, to Buffy the Body and Rihanna, there is a slide show without a shred of pretense at anything other male gratification. It was merely “during this year, this male rapper decided that this ass is what women should aspire to,” slapped in a “Sexy” Issue as a bold testament to the control men have over what is considered sexy, subsequently, brainwashing women into exaggerating the body part du jour that they believe makes them beautiful.
Truth moment: Though most women will say they take pride in their big butt, imagine for one moment that it wasn’t desirable to men?
What if tiny butts were in vogue, the smaller the better? There would be no pumping parties, or silicone injections, women would be doing whatever they could to conform to the standard of desirability of the day. When I see an obviously unnatural behind, I don’t think, “Wow, she is a sexy woman.” Instead, it makes me sad because there goes one more sister who places love of male attention over love of self.
As cliche as it may sound to many, confidence is sexier than a curvy backside any day of the week and twice on Sunday. The certain je ne sais quoi that emanates from a woman who doesn’t care if you can sit a cup on it or if it’s big enough to “back it up and dump it” like trash; she’d rather you appreciate the unique sexiness that only she possesses. The woman who’d rather be alone than be plastic will get more respect every time than the one who has compromised the fact that she is naturally priceless, all so she can be reduced to a “dime.”
Women are so much more than a big butt and a smile. And the moment we realize it, and call out the male-driven images that manipulate standards of beauty in our society, the “Age of the Fat Ass” will end.
And it couldn’t come soon enough.
Black men love it. White men understand this. Black and brown women are complicit. Thus, there is profit to be made all around.
All I see is rape culture being exploited by executives, using people who don’t have anything better to do in this economy. I can’t be mad at the current state of black culture, which is American culture. It is what it is. But if people were ever to make a concerted effort to sustain a campaign against the people in charge, there might be a way to offer higher paying careers for young black youth so that this is not as glamorous but in the same breath we wired to at least give some attention to sex, so – much like fast-food companies which understand we, humans, love salt, fat, and sugar – the entertainment industry exploits it with cheap shit that keeps us coming back for more.
As someone who has been perceived as sexy for the better part of my life, I can tell you it has nothing to do with exagerated body parts but something that comes from within. It is ironic and sad that 80%+ of hip hop is homosexual yet they find these surgically altered exagerated body parts on women du jour? Right LOL, women need to wake up and stop catering to a culture that openly hates you.
On this topic? One could easily just rant. So haiku will do.
A full derriere… AND an open female mind? BOTH are quite sexy.
We refuse the shame! Why apologize for lust? It is natural.
Femininity… Draws masculine attention. Form does serve function.
Booties deserve shine. Not shame! Once shunned, now embraced.
Age of the fat ass? More the age of the fat head. Compliments aren’t insults.
Beauty standards? Shift. Hapless? Helpless victims? No. We don’t buy that.
Furthermore? Be clear. Phat ass? Not loved by ALL men. Pity. Sad, but true.
Hence, this triumph. Past objectification. Now adoration.
From the start to end. THIS one fact of life stays true. The seat of power…
…IS YOU! -A Haiku Penned. By lover of phat asses. And women with them.
These women are beautiful. It sucks what happened to the woman who thought it was cool to get a kitchen ass implant surgery. But any man would date any one of those women in the picture above and that’s what that woman wanted.
Wow, to be given a perfectly healthy fully functioning temple and decide to renovate and “upgrade” it AND AT A BUDGET PRICE is just a slap in the face of God.
Can’t really say much, but I feel like there is a disconnect between what men say they want and what they actually want. My ex boyfriend was an ass man but he ended up with me. I have a “nice” butt (its there), but nothing you would see in smooth magazine. A guy I like now always goes on and on about big butts, and how he wants one. Guess who he is starting to crush on? Its all bullshit, and men buy into it to compensate for something. I feel bad for the women who buy into it too. I guess I never did because I prefer a figure that is well proportioned, carrying around all that weight in your ass looks inconvenient to me.
Whatever the standard of beauty, there is a group who will believe it to be exploitative. You can’t like skinny models or you have “warped” ideas of what a real woman should look like. Yet you can’t like “thick” women because then you’re a heathen who must be slavishly attracted to nothing but their curves. If you prefer a thin flat butt you’re a brainwashed white woman lover, if you lust after a fat rump you’re a sexist pig who reduces women to body parts. Hell, you better not like white women at all or you’re a sellout loser. You can’t prefer light skin women (even though they’re still black) because you’re color-struck but there is no issue with having a preference for dark skin…even though that technically can also mean you’re color-struck. If you like long hair, you’re lost in Eurocentric ideals of beauty. Prefer small breasts? You’re really a closet pedophile. Prefer giant breasts? Pig. Like young women? You’re a creepy perv. Like older women? You’re looking for a mommy figure. Like a women with muscles? Closet gay. And on and on.
That woman with the insanely large natural ass should not be worshipped but you (the collective you of the aggrieved) should? Why? Let’s play out the little thought experiment in your article. Let’s say small butts were preferred over big butts. You do realize that probably means you’d have written an article decrying women going for small butts and criticizing men for liking them? Funny.
It’s as if all the women who fit into any of these categories are unworthy of adoration, admiration, love, lust and attraction because some other group will feel aggrieved. As if the women in the “middle” of whatever the measurement is that day – just a “nice” butt, not too big, not too small – are the only ones that should be liked. Should others not be liked or loved? Why are women who are not X, Y or Z better than women who are?
Can someone please tell us who are the correct women to be attracted to so we can glorify them and make all groups happy? Or, better yet, how about just understanding that in some cultures men go crazy over a woman’s ankle and showing it off is just as provocative as wearing a pair of low-cut jeans in the U.S. And, yes, there is probably an article being written in those countries decrying all the lecherous men lusting for ankles.
And, yes, it’s just as silly as this one.
P.S. Obviously, endangering yourself to change your appearance is dumb and should be frowned upon. But I think this article goes beyond that so my comments followed suit.
@diar: I completely agree. That’s the problem with feminists in general, although I don’t think you are taking any shots at feminism. This article looks at the problem as if it can be solved by a little more self esteem which absurd. Woman and men are going to use whatever material, animate or inanimate, to attract the opposite sex. In the seventies, Twiggy was all the rage and everyone in pop culture was skinny. Pam Grier was hot and women wanted and afro and a gun. It’s just what everyone is into now.
The problem with feminists? Wow, do you even know what feminism means? To think that there are people in the world who aren’t okay with our capital/sexist/white supremacist patriarchy?! What a shame! Did you read the article? Just because Twiggy was the ideal body in the 70’s does that make it okay? The point is the media and other outlets reduce women to body parts and tell us what we’re supposed to look like/aim for. If you don’t believe me, open a magazine, turn on the tv, or surf the internet. Encouraging positive self-esteem, normal body images, and self acceptance can help change these ways of thinking so that girls won’t feel the pressure to fit a certain ideal.
AMEN!!!!! Diar you are so spot on, it’s crazy!
I have a naturally big butt…nothing artificial…. but unfortunately, am married to a man who prefers a SLIM backside! Oh well! If you’re trying to get “fat” just to please men, that’s stupid and you may pay the price of diabetes or cancer, heart disease, etc…. why are women so exploitable these days?