For one week out of the month, some women (including myself) can become estranged from reality. Hell week — as I lovingly call it — or the week I get my menstrual cycle, is the time when the only thing that matters to me is whether or not Motrin or Ibuprofen will be the stronger medicine to help relieve my cramps. It’s also the week where every word that comes out of a man’s mouth can seem insensitive and irritating. So here are some guidelines on what NOT to say during that time.
Things you should never say to a woman when she’s on her period.
Tell me when it’s over, with the “here we go again” attitude, or my favorite” damn, wasn’t it just on a couple few days ago?”
“hurl a shoe”? I love it! I’ll definitely have to remember that one next time my man says something I can’t thing of a way to argue with him about. It’s not like he can do anything about it or hit me back! I’d have him put away so fast his head would spin. Womyn power!
Wow, really? You would “have him put away”? How very misandric of you, Natalie!
Let me get this straight; You (the female) are allowed to hit, throw shoes at, curse, scream at, and otherwise degrade/harm your partner (the male)…and if he retaliates you will file a false abuse case with the police and have his liberty taken away. Sounds about right for our very pathetic and disgusting society…man gets hit – it is his fault. Woman gets hit – its STILL his fault. I’m not saying that one shouldn’t report ACTUAL domestic abuse…but making up a false report that YOU STARTED is not only illegal but completely unethical. I truly hope this was a sick joke.
Btw, you do know that the spelling of women you used (womyn) is what we of the anti misandric community use to differentiate REAL women (like myself) who want true equality for both sexes, from fake womyn (like yourself) who enjoy being “superior” to menfolk. Maybe one day you’ll learn that neither sex is superior to the other…but I doubt it.
Or how about something along the lines of “I’m horny…how long have you been on your period? Six days? Seems like forever.”
Not unless I’m not a woman myself, but I think sometimes we sensationalise being on a period a little bit too much.
Dr Horndog, not-an-MD says: “You’re on your period? Oh okay let’s have sex, it’ll be good for your symptoms” Me:”No sweetie, I feel yucky and definitely not sexy” Him:”That’s okay take a shower and we’ll put a towel on the bed…it’s all good” & “I’ll get you some Motrin”Me: “Ninja white boy! I said No!*at this time PMSzilla is peaking* Him: “Are you sure?I’ll be quick..” -_-
Mind you, He’s a sweetie and I’m pretty nice for the rest of the days but those darn 4-5 days..idk…I change from mild mannered chick to semi-super douche. I wish I was faking the moodswings 🙁
How bout not calling me boo at any point and time of the month, year, in life etc.
You forgot “What about head?”
After which he get’s slapped in it
Okay, this is the only really recent posting about this topic that still has comments open, so I’m going to ask:
What is the big deal about having a period.
I mean, I’m 26…I got my first period at age 10. That first year wasn’t fun, I had cramps, spotting, no real cycle yet, would cry at the drop of a hat, felt like bingeing on any food in sight. However, by the time I was 11, all that had disappeared. Since then I’ve had a normal, pain free, non bingeing, four day period and a clockwork 29 day cycle. I don’t scream, cry, throw tantrums or eat chocolate every hour…I’m a completely rational, normal, functioning adult…just like always.
So my question is this; why do other women act like their world is coming to an end and lash out inexplicably at anyone around them? I don’t get it…
When you get a little older, you will understand.
@iQgraphics: I sincerely doubt that. I’ve been told “you’ll understand…” ever since I was 11, and no sudden dawning of comprehension has occurred yet. I have a feeling that I’ll never understand this phenomena, but I think I’m okay with that.
@Anastasia: Because for many women, it is truly horrible. Just because your period is almost heavenly (or at least uneventful) doesn’t mean that is the norm for other women.
I sometimes get cramps that make me feel weak and dizzy or give me so much pain that I am on or near the toilet. And I get depressed and sad very easily. I just want to be alone (because I don’t want to lash out or bring down everyone else), but then when I try, my mate tries to make me feel bad for going to my own little corner (“Why are you acting so anti-social?”). I swear he actually picks with me more when I’m on my period–it’s almost like he feels like I deserve to be picked on because of it. Just let me be. I mean damn, my pms symptoms last for 3 days. I give him so much slack for his I-had-a-bad-day-at-work jerkiness, so why can’t I get 3 days out of the month to be left alone? Ok, I’m done ranting.
@Le: I think that “uneventful” would be the proper term. Other than the obvious bleeding for 3 or 4 days, the only mental/emotional change I notice is that I’m more annoyed by stupidity than usual. As I work in the retail industry (a nice hobby/comic/gaming store) you can imagine this happens weekly…if not daily.
But yes, that is the full extent of my symptoms. I find it odd that having a period can go from my exteme to your extreme. It’s almost like discussing apples and oranges!
@Anastasia: I used to only have mild cramps as a teen, and then once I turned 20, the severe cramps, depressed moods and weepiness started. Sometimes even waves of hotness come over me (I don’t think they are hot flashes, though). I never understood why other ladies swore that it was so horrible…and then it happened to me.
@Le: I understand, and I’m sorry that happens to you every month. But I’ll be 27 soon…and have yet to experience any of this. I mean, my period affects me so minimally that I don’t even mind having sex during it. As the women in my family typically go through menopause at 45, I am beginning to think I’ll never have to worry about being this way. Thank you for sharing your own experience though!
@Anastasia: because you feel literally on edge. Every person has their own experience in and to various degrees, some women have PMDD (Pre Menstrual Disphoric Disorder) which is almost psychotic to rational thinking people during that time. When I was younger I had no issues whatsoever, now after 3 kids who are teenagers I’m an emotional piece of work when I’m PMSing and it happens every month and like clockwork I’m emotional, irritated & on edge. I know it’s going to happen but there is nothing you can do about it. It just IS what it is. Be grateful you have a smoothe ride and pray it doesn’t get bumpy over time.
@Emmce: Very interesting. Am I to understand you had little to no symptoms (like myself) when you were younger…but then became typical after having gone thru pregnancies? Whew, if that’s the case I am doubly glad I’ve decided to not have kids in this life! I don’t think any of my friends (all men) would enjoy hanging out with me if I suddenly suffered from PMS or PMDD. Of course, I do sympathize with what you say you go through…it sounds awful.
Strangely enough, I had always thought that these complaints were largely psychosomatic due to our culture talking about it so much. I still think that is a part of it, but maybe not as much as I thought.
I used to suffer from PMDD when I was in undergrad and I think FOR ME, what contributed to it was excess stress, pretty bad sleep deprivation and a terrible diet. I was also dealing with mild depression. Every month, I would get really, really really tired and could barely get out of bed even after 11 hours of sleep during that time. I would also get SUICIDAL thoughts like clockwork every month. It was hell and I never went to the doctor for it, i don’t know why.
After moving back home and cleaning up my diet (most importantly eating more veggies and greens) becoming somewhat less sleep deprived and reducing stress, I noticed that my PMDD was pretty much PMS…there were even times were I barely had any PMS symptoms in terms of irritability or fatigue. Now my diet is not so good at the moment, i’m back in school and my PMS is getting worse but it’s not as bad as it was before. I also tried taking ground flax seed and it helped alot with PMS even with a crap diet. It’s a plant estrogen though so for me, it DELAYED my period and made it shorter (which i didn’t mind). I actually didn’t start my flow till I stopped using it so I backed far away. Other women have not had that problem though and some say it normalizes your flow but everybody is different.
Anyway, I totally sympathize with you especially with kids, family and i can imagine a job. I’m actually scared about dealing with my PMS when I’m at that stage but I’ll be fine.
@Anastasia: the only thing I can say is that I might be slightly more irritable, but the physical symptoms I get are crazy. Every month I have severe cramping, pass out, throw up, and then pass out again. I started my period when I was 10, but when I was about 13 it suddenly crossed the line. It is terrible and finally, at 24 I am finally on a birth control to help the symptoms. All the women in my family have been this way. The only way the physical extremes went away was after they had children. So hopefully after I have children one day it will help.
@Telekendall: Wow, I’m sorry that happens to you. I don’t want to have children, but if you do want them AND it helps your symptoms then I think that is an awesome thing!
@Telekendall: I’m so sorry about your experience. My sister in law and mother had terrible cramps…my sister in law’s tales were the WORST, I just couldn’t believe some women have such terrible cramps. Theirs got better after having children also.
not every woman is as lucky as you seem to be.
To be fair, I know some women who have it easier, but I also know way more that have real problems with their monthlys.
Just like some women have migraines, some don´t..and those that don´t have ever such a bad headache they feel as if their head explodes and they vomit and cry and are sensitive to light, noise and smells, they will never really 100% understand how bad a migraine can be and that it is not an ordinary headache.
Yes, you may never, ever understand what it is about period that makes most women complain…be happy about it.
“you go thru this every month, you ain’t used to it by now”
“it can’t be that bad”
I used to go through cramping, crying the whole nine until I changed my diet to vegetarian….no more cramps and 3 days periods….try the diet, at least a week before it starts..it really works.
@Ms. Information: Now this is very interesting…I’ve been a vegetarian since I was 12. I decided that vegetarianism fit much better with my conversion to Wicca, which also happened at that age. I’ve been an ovo-lacto (no meat or animals of any kind, and YES fish/seafood are animals) and only eat eggs/milk from local farms where the animals are treated right.
Strangely enough, my mother and 1 of my sisters converted from Christianity to Wicca just as I did…but they were never able to give up eating meat. It makes for an interesting Yule and Thanksgiving when you’re the only vegetarian there! Oh well, I’d rather have a specialized diet and no menstrual issues than to eat flesh of others AND have a horrible period.
@Ms. Information: I know this is TMI but I notice less clotting and less heavy flow…I’ve also noticed my PMS (fatigue, irritability, depression) is not as bad the more vegetables I eat. I’m looking into becoming a flexitarian but would be nice to eat a vegetarian diet the week before it starts on a regular basis..
if i’m pms’ing or if it’s the first 2-3 days of my flow then the man would get a kick in the nuts..
@deb: I really hope you don’t mean that. I’m sure you’re exaggerating, but I know there are some women who ACTUALLY kick men in the groin. I just wanted to make sure you were kidding, because this type of misandric language is terrifying and disturbing to me…if you don’t want a man in your life to kick YOU in your most sacred of body parts, then why on earth would you kick HIM in his most sacred?
Honestly I really hate when he says eww or gross or something like grow up I know it’s gross but you saying it doesn’t make me feel any better. Glad to know I disgust you